PORTLAND, OR — In what officials are calling "the most beautiful display of unity since that Pepsi commercial," Officer Brandon McCarthy and activist Destiny Williams put aside their differences Thursday to clean up downtown streets using the only tools they had available: their luxuriously long hair.

The unprecedented collaboration began after both parties ran out of traditional cleaning supplies following a 14-hour standoff over municipal budget allocations.

"At first, we were just staring at each other across the barricade," McCarthy explained, his shoulder-length locks still glistening with street debris. "Then Destiny pointed at my hair, I pointed at hers, and we just... knew."

Witnesses report the pair spent three hours on their hands and knees, swinging their heads in synchronized arcs to gather litter, cigarette butts, and what appeared to be several protest signs from earlier in the day.

"I've been growing my hair out for two years for a protest statement," Williams said, wringing motor oil from her waist-length braids. "Never thought I'd use it for community service alongside the police. But here we are. Progress looks weird sometimes."

The mayor's office has announced plans to issue official hair nets to all officers and protesters as standard equipment, calling it "a sustainable, hands-free approach to civic responsibility."

At press time, both parties were receiving medical treatment for severe neck strain and considering a joint GoFundMe for actual cleaning supplies.

Editor's Note: This is a work of satire. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental and/or exaggerated for comedic effect. Please do not attempt to clean streets with your hair. Use actual cleaning supplies.